I'm swinging up and down, Not knowing what is coming along, As I go up, I see the most beautiful sight, And when I'm down I watch the lava flowing inside. At one point I have the heaven, An angel standing beside me, Telling the truth, separating the right from the wrong, Guiding the way, showing the perfect path for my journey. Then, suddenly I'm in hell, Fighting with my demons, Burning myself in the fire, Where temptations are crawling around me, And every inch of my body and mind is tired of struggling with the strongest evil that I have ever known.
I'm swinging up and down, Not knowing where I belong, The harder I push myself to be in a place where I can hear melodious song, To make peace with my past, Longing for the serendipity that other people have known, The deeper I plunge into an ocean of darkness, Into the void where I was left alone, Trying to get a grasp on my life, for one breath. I'm swinging up and down, Not knowing if I should carry on. -JMJ
When I first found you, I thought it's good to have you, You made me believe that you helped me grow, And that you are the reason that I glow. But then as years passed by, You made your way to each and every cells of mine, Killing all the normalcy, There were times that I couldn't even clearly see. Many years passed and you became a part of me, Biting my lips I tolerated all the painyou caused to me. But now, as your toxin is spreading to my brain and affectingthe people around me, It's time to do a surgical incision and do an ectomy. -JMJ
She can see herself on the ground, Cold and stiff with no earthly bound, Free from all the life's strife, And all the words of the world acting like a knife. People came to pay her last respect, Standing in between them she did expect, A little love that she always longed for, Was that too much to ask for?
She could hear that they were saying prayers, Judging about her destination in their heart with fake tears, As she could now understand them inside out, Stop! That's all she wanted to shout. Instead she looked once more on the body and smiled, Then walked away leaving everything behind. -JMJ
Walking on the beach and letting the sunlight touch my skin, I allowed sand and water to be my kin, While listening to the waves and watching the birds sing, Tears rolled down as it made my heart swing. Thinking only about all the disappointments and downs in my life, I wasn't being grateful to the God who gave me the life.
Then I saw a young girl selling roasted peanuts, With dirty hands, torn clothes but she was no nuts, Even after a dreadful long day she had her hopes high, With love in her eyes, she walked gracefully without giving a sigh. When she offered me her peanuts seeing me cry, I could only stare at her and couldn't ask why, The beach was a place where I could find my final peace, Instead I found God in her face and I walked back in grace in one piece. -JMJ
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We were in love when the fate decided to separate us, Holding on end of the rope from top of the mountain, You told me that you would never let me go, But, when I decided to let go of myself from your life, I just was making sure you to be safe and happy even without me in it, But, I promised that I will be waiting for you in the next. While falling I asked you to run as soldiers were marching towards you, I saw you were dragged out of my sight as I was slowly closing my eyes.
I have been waiting one life after another as I promised, Searching for you, I knew that I will recognize you, As our souls knew each other long before that these generations could even think, When we finally met, you had no memory of the past, You thought that it was just another thing and could make some time pass, May be I will have to wait hundreds of years to see the whole you again, When you will remember the end of the rope and the hope in my eyes, Or may be you will just listen to your soul this time. -JMJ
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What takes a heart to be at rest, To not to think of all the days which were the worst. What takes a mind not to wander to, All the way back which were never meant to. However I try, I can't call them back, It's like they have been taken from someone in the past. Haunting memories of an innocent smile, Blue eyes with an ocean inside, The days were so wonderful with you on my side, All those pictures are talking to me and tearing me from inside. When all mothers are celebrating the day with their children by their side, All I can hope is you are at rest with no pain to cry, Oh my baby! I hope you are having a good time with God by your side. -JMJ
Dedicated to all the mothers who lost their children.
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A Life's Journey 