Do you feel like sometimes whatever you do to make things right it’s not enough? You try and keep on trying to make other people’s life easier and happier but ultimately, you get blamed for the things that you never did.
You feel like everyone’s fingers are pointing on you and you don’t even know why? People take advantage of your silence because you don’t want to hurt others by telling the truth. Every morning you get up hoping that it would be a good day and try to be positive but you overhear people saying lies about you and spreading gossips.
You feel like to shout on top of your voice saying to the whole world that you are innocent but all you can do is swallow your words and take shelter in the dark corner of a room. You feel like you are walking on the eggshells.
Do you feel like even if you are honest about each and everything, everyone will make you a liar because that is what they want for their reputation and benefits? Have you ever felt how cold the world can be?
Have you ever had an incident in your life which has affected youa lot later? Something, which is still fresh in your mind even if ithad happened a long time ago. A face that you cannot forget.
I have a story to tell you which has been haunting me since several years. I still remember the day when I was going to church with my mother and my little brother. I think I was twelve or thirteen years old. While walking, I saw a middle aged man, walking towards us. From a distance itself I had a feeling of uneasiness. When he came nearer I gave him a glance and I took my mother’s hand to hold in shock.
You must be thinking that he might have done something. Then, you are wrong. In this story, I’m the villainess. My behavior was totally based on his physical feature, his facial disfigurement. It was like he didn’t have a nose or mouth and those organs were all joined together to appear like a big mass on his face. I had never seen anyone like that before. The way I reacted after I saw him was so rude and unkind that he quickly walked past us bowing his head. But before he did that I saw disappointment and sadness on his face.
That night, I couldn’t sleep because I got scared of him. It didn’t occur to me at that time that I’m theone who had hurt him. Only thing that bothered me was his face. It took a few years and anursingdegree course to make me realize what wasthe cause for his disfiguredface. What I did was so wrong even though it was unintentional.
I still remember his face but the feelings are not the same. Regret has taken the place of fear. That was the first and the last time I saw him. I never got the chance to say sorry to him in person.This post is a confession and I would like to take this chance to say, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I was so ignorant and unkind that I behaved like that. I’m sorry that I judged you based on your face without knowing you in person. I’m sorry that I hurt your feelings when I looked away because I wanted to avoid you. I’m deeply sorry for what I have done.” So if you read this, I hope that you do, please take it as an apology from my heart.
Alone in a deep forest, Thinking about whether to protest, Against all discriminations and bias, Or to hide away and be pious. She saw innocents being crucified, Blamed and buried for something they had never tried, Powerful was taking advantage and pulling the strings, And then they claimed about their sufferings! The reality was reversed as people closed their eyes, The perpetrators said they were victimized, Now, how can she just be quiet? The perfect storm was in formation and she said to them, try it. -JMJ
A beautiful creature inside and out, Silent in nature by default, Was prejudiced because of its appearances, And their screams were deafening to its interiors. Threatened to stay inside its hole, Was always chased by others with a wooden pole, Each time it came out to find its food, They circled around to beat at its hood. Everytime it felt insecure, It would just bite them harder, But one day the snake was dead on the street, Where they found, their poison had burst out of its body, poor beast. -JMJ
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Is it the black, brown or white, The colors that can truly describe, A man's character and intentions, Or is his job done without any assumptions? Is it the blonde, brunette or red head, The colors that can truly describe, A woman's intelligence and kindness, Or is her good deeds with no judgements? Is it the blue, green or the hazel eyes, The colors that can truly describe, A man's love and passion, Or is it the act itself which has no condition? Is it the color that defines us? Or is it us who define colors? -JMJ
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Every week, I make sure that I watch a movie with my daughter which has a moral lesson to learn and this time, I chose “Wonder”. It is a feel good movie which teaches us to value and honor the differences in others. Now, why I wanted my daughter to see it is because I wanted to show her how bullying can impact the lives of people involved and why is it necessary to stop it from the beginning.
If you think bullying is only in schools or colleges then you are wrong. It can happen in your workplace or even in a public place in any form (physical, verbal or cyber) and from anyone to anyone, no matter what age, sex, colour or creed. I remember meeting an old aged man. He asked me from where I’m and was it the first time I travelled out of my country and when I replied to his questions, he gave me a remark which I still cannot forget after two years. In his own words, “It must be an eye opener for you then, seeing all the beautiful white faces here.” Considering his age and physical condition, I didn’t give him any response but it did hurt me a lot. That incident is a proof that even in this 21st century, a person can be so narrow minded to even think like this.
Everyone of us must have a story of their own about bullying and how we feel about it. It may have happened only once in the life time but I’m sure that it’s one thing which we cannot forget easily. It can affect us physically, emotionally and mentally and can cause long term consequences such as psychosomatic diseases, low self esteem, suicidal ideation and substance abuse. It can also have a serious effect on the bullied person socially by causing difficulty in the establishment of trusting reciprocal friendships and relationships.
As a solution to this social menace, government has implemented anti bullying laws and schools teach children how to identify and tackle them. But most importantly, I think that the anti bullying campaign should start from the family from an early age. I believe that a child learns what the grown ups practice and not what they preach. So, it is our responsibility to show children to respect others in all their differences, no matter what their looks, color, age, status, religion or nationality are and to love them for their inner qualities. This way, not only the schools and colleges will be safe but also the work places and public places too.
Not all forms of abuse leave bruises.
The common mistake that bullies make is assuming that because someone is nice that he or she is weak. Those traits have nothing to do with each other. In fact, it takes considerable strength and character to be a good person.
Mary Elizabeth Williams
Bullying consists of the least competent most aggressive employee projecting their incompetence on to the least aggressive most competent employee and winning.
All cruelty springs from weakness.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca
We all lose when bullying and personal attacks become a substitute for genuine conversation and principled disagreement.
This isn’t a high school thing or an age thing. It’s a people thing. People cut other people down out of jealousy, because of something broken inside them, or for no reason at all. Just don’t let them change you or stop you from singing or dancing around to your favorite song.
People say sticks and stones may break your bones, but names can never hurt you, but that’s not true. Words can hurt. They hurt me. Things were said to me that I still haven’t forgotten.
No one heals himself by wounding another.
Please post your views on the topic as I would really love to read them.